October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I have a number of friends who have lost babies to miscarriage, stillbirth, or early death. It's more common than you might think. My heart always is heavy when I think of the babies missing in their lives, of who these babies might have become.
If you know someone who has lost a baby to miscarriage, stillbirth, or early infant death, please give them sympathy and a listening ear. Don't tell them how to feel or second-guess their situation, but just listen. If the time seems right, ask them how they are doing or offer to just hold them. They may not want to grieve in front of others, so a card or a message of love and support can be helpful yet still allow them to grieve in private. Take your cue from the mother as to what kind of support she needs. Don't assume she'll be "over it" in a month or two. That loss will likely live on in her heart forever.
We remember:
the babies born sleepingthose we carried,
but never held,
those we held,but could not take home.those who came home,
but could not stay.
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