tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post6422309599804402437..comments2024-03-17T10:07:53.205-07:00Comments on The Well-Rounded Mama: Fourth Annual Turkey Awards: Leaps of Logic, the Dead Baby Card, and Scorched Earth TacticsWell-Rounded Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04129621631406155340noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-67153550462230117132012-02-13T00:03:33.659-08:002012-02-13T00:03:33.659-08:00I was pregnant back in 88. I did NOT have GD. I ha...I was pregnant back in 88. I did NOT have GD. I had one doctor tell me my baby was going to be huge, and I'd better hope I went into labor 2 weeks early or else I'd end up with a Cesarean, which was bound to get infected due to my size. In fact I went 10 days past my due date and she was a perfectly average 7.5 lbs, delivered naturally with a midwife who was great.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15289522825322993939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-72793290917621542072012-01-06T02:45:15.386-08:002012-01-06T02:45:15.386-08:00Oh, I also HIGHLY recommend the book Tear Soup for...Oh, I also HIGHLY recommend the book Tear Soup for people dealing with grief. You might want to add it to your list of resources. A friend who had gone through an early miscarriage sent it to us with a not about she knew it was not the same, but she had gotten a copy of this book and thought it might be of help to us. We now order and send it to people dealing with any sort of trauma or grief on an (unfortunatly) regular basis. It is not about dealing with child-loss or pregnancy loss in particular. It takes the form of a children's book but is excellently set out. <br /><br />Thank you for your kind words.Rachelhttp://mygabbi.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-82544711000687616372012-01-05T21:06:36.463-08:002012-01-05T21:06:36.463-08:00Rachel, I'm so sorry that your baby died. Som...Rachel, I'm so sorry that your baby died. Sometimes there really isn't anything you can do to prevent it, but self-blame is so common in these scenarios. <br /><br />If you work in birth circles long enough, sooner or later you know someone who lost a baby to a cord accident. Statistically it's rare, but it's SO incredibly hard when it does happen. <br /><br />Most of the ones I have known who have lost a baby this way were average-sized. And every single one of them has found something to agonize over, a what-if that haunted them. <br /><br />When something bad happens to women of size, though, it's nearly always their fatness they focus on. It's our go-to blame card, and it's made worse when it's a care provider's go-to blame card too, or when people make careless or insensitive remarks along the way. <br /><br />You worked really hard at self-care and something still happened. It's a hard lesson that sometimes things just happen. Then we look around for something to blame, and our cultural training is to go first to our weight. It's a hard pattern to get out of.<br /><br />I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you have connected with the many online resources available to women whose babies have died.<br /><br />http://www.amazon.com/Empty-Cradle-Broken-Heart-Revised/dp/1555913024<br />http://grieveoutloud.org <br />http://www.marchofdimes.com/baby/loss.html<br />http://www.honoredbabies.org/resource-center/<br />http://www.lifecirclecc.com/files/Pregnancy_Loss_and_Infant_Death.pdf<br />Ended Beginnings by Panuthos and Romeo<br />www.compassionatefriends.org<br />www.APlaceToRemember.comWell-Rounded Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04129621631406155340noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-59930095770106614492012-01-05T01:25:12.857-08:002012-01-05T01:25:12.857-08:00You know what? I am fat and had GD during my last...You know what? I am fat and had GD during my last pregnancy. I worked with my doctor, and a dietician and took my insulin properly and got my numbers so within range that my A1C both times I had it done while pregnant was a 5.2. You know what? I still had a dead baby. Cord accident. Nothing I could have done. Could have happened to anyone- but for 10 months now I have spent the time going over and over, if I had been thinner would I have known something was wrong. Stupid sure, but one off hand comment by an idiot OB I saw early can make you crazy for a lifetime.Rachelhttp://mygabbi.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-11034373945339186042011-12-30T03:58:13.761-08:002011-12-30T03:58:13.761-08:00Thanks so much for keeping track of these issues, ...Thanks so much for keeping track of these issues, posting regularly, and being such a voice of sanity. Happy New Year!dee.calarcohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09785552182549176029noreply@blogger.com