tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post30999479924983349..comments2024-03-17T10:07:53.205-07:00Comments on The Well-Rounded Mama: Belly ThoughtsWell-Rounded Mamahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04129621631406155340noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-81468491599309695882016-06-30T03:08:50.559-07:002016-06-30T03:08:50.559-07:00And I then held a celebration of pregnant bellies ...And I then held a celebration of pregnant bellies in women of size here:<br /><br />http://wellroundedmama.blogspot.com/2011/05/belly-blog-carnival.htmlWell-Rounded Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04129621631406155340noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-20346505715311505802016-06-30T02:57:25.075-07:002016-06-30T02:57:25.075-07:00My follow-up response to these comments was writte...My follow-up response to these comments was written about here:<br /><br />http://wellroundedmama.blogspot.com/2011/02/further-belly-thoughts.html Well-Rounded Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04129621631406155340noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-42582615811594265522014-01-13T21:59:34.768-08:002014-01-13T21:59:34.768-08:00The first picture above looks like my belly. I am ...The first picture above looks like my belly. I am a bigger girl and no one thinks i look pregnant except my mom and some people who really pay attention to me. Everyone is shocked to hear i am 29 weeks. And thankyou for making this it really eased my mind with a lot of things. :)Destinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-19830741705471745212013-07-24T01:06:08.236-07:002013-07-24T01:06:08.236-07:00Love this blog, I can relate in all ways of writer...Love this blog, I can relate in all ways of writer. It made me laugh just to have the I'm not alone feeling. I have about 11weeks left and get to.meet this little one!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13499581300077948422noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-30452081044894072292011-08-01T09:32:05.275-07:002011-08-01T09:32:05.275-07:00I am pregnant with my first baby and was really su...I am pregnant with my first baby and was really surprised when I ACTUALLY started showing EARLY.. like at week 5. I know they say you wont that early but trust me, I have pictures and the belly that popped out that early was obviously a baby bump look as opposed to the "I ate too many burritos" look. I am overweight anyway so I know the difference between my fat belly and pregnant belly. And I needed to buy maternity clothes that early too. I surprised my hubby by embracing it all and embracing my new huge belly as it grew.. He really thought I would fall into the "Im getting fat" trap. But I didnt. of course to be fair my hips and thighs seemed to have shrunk as the belly and books grew... this may have been because the morning sickness was so bad that I lost about 15 pounds. I am now 23 weeks and am still under the prepregnancy weight of 247. Let see what the next 17 weeks bring. lolAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-43868890992074998422011-05-23T18:25:57.667-07:002011-05-23T18:25:57.667-07:00My sil didn't look pregnant till really close ...My sil didn't look pregnant till really close to the end. I wasn't sure what to do so just avoided the subject completely while wishing I knew the right thing to say. Do you have any suggestions for how close ones around the pregancy can supportively and postively make a contribution both pre and post ?Secret Admirerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04795452479708451539noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-45355605241198931382011-03-03T13:30:21.022-08:002011-03-03T13:30:21.022-08:00The initial post, as I said before, was a difficul...The initial post, as I said before, was a difficult read for me-especially as a big bellied girl. I was not prepared for it-as it was much different from the usual tone of your posts. The trigger warning is a thoughful gesture. <br /><br />BUT as I said before I am glad you wrote it and I think that you must write honestly. <br /><br />It's good to be made uncomfortable and be challenged. We don't want to make fat acceptance a fairy tale land where we have to mask who we are and what we think.<br /><br />So I say keep writing-what you want & how you want.Miranoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-35152997469940374322011-02-24T08:05:50.741-08:002011-02-24T08:05:50.741-08:00As a heavy woman who finally got her first positiv...As a heavy woman who finally got her first positive pregnancy test (after 5 long years of trying), I really appreciate this thread - and your blog. Thank you for writing about obesity in pregnancy & child-birth. It makes us prepared to fight the fight.penguinladynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-29069588537280247202011-02-23T11:17:29.046-08:002011-02-23T11:17:29.046-08:00I just read yourvpost on the fallout from "Be...I just read yourvpost on the fallout from "Belly Thoughts" and I came here to chime in and say I loved this post. I have read it over and over again and I relate to everything you say. Please don't censor your self of hesitate to post here, I read everything you write and as a fat woman who is six months pregnant with my first child you are one of my main guidelines for how I interact with my health professionals. I am more confident now with questioning them and making more clear what I am expecting from this pregnancy. Thankyou again for this blog, please don't chnage :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-77085177071187848912011-02-10T10:42:37.172-08:002011-02-10T10:42:37.172-08:00I almost cried several times reading this. Why? Be...I almost cried several times reading this. Why? Because it was the first pregnancy body related post that actually spoke to me and understood what I was going through. For the first time I didn't feel alone. Thank you!<br /><br /> I know some people have commented that they have felt put off by some of the language in the post, but I found it honest, real, and relatable. You backed it up with really positive affirmations and ways to encourage a more healthy thought process, and that meant the world. If I can't get myself to think like that everyday on my own, then it is nice that I can turn here and read it as a way to help me cope with my own struggles.<br /><br />I get so frustrated reading pregnancy magazines, celebrity bump watches, and maternity clothing ads that all cater to the lithe, graceful woman who is happily caressing her perfectly round belly. I will never look like that, and it is often hard not to want to considering the way our culture puts it on a pedestal, claiming it is the most beautiful way to be pregnant. <br /><br />Your belly painting was so gorgeous and gave me a huge smile to imagine my toddler girl being able to do it in a few months! I am also going to get belly henna done this time around as a way to honor my body instead of being so frustrated with it.<br /><br />All in all, thank you! You are beautiful both inside and out :) Keep doing what you are doing!Katie Seelingernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-89546940870125073232011-02-08T22:31:38.630-08:002011-02-08T22:31:38.630-08:00Oh, this post so spoke to me! As you know (since y...Oh, this post so spoke to me! As you know (since you know quite a bit of my journey), I was in South Korea during most of my pregnancy. South Korea has a 3% obesity rate, much lower than the rate in the US. A plus size woman struggles as it is (heck a NORMAL size American women struggles over there!) but to add pregnancy to that, oh boy. I ended up with SO MUCH self-loathing, it wasn't even funny. At least with my first pregnancy, I was okay and had had some pictures including some with my belly out. This time around? Uh-uh. I had some with clothes on but you can barely tell I'm pregnant. I get a bump on top and it's hard and then there's this flab below it and I was SO not impressed.<br /><br />A number of things happened during that pregnancy that didn't help, it seemed like there was just so much more in the way of fat bashing during my more recent pregnancy. Hard to say. Sadly, during both pregnancies, hardly anyone asked to touch the belly. My pregnancies really were not celebrated by family at all (outside my husband and daughter anyway). It was hard because I had worked for so long to not let it all get to me and the whole thing was just really hard on my self-esteem. Post pregnancy hasn't been much better and I still cannot believe some of the pictures a friend of mine got of me, still in the hospital, in a hospital gown, BREASTFEEDING. lol Nothing at all like the pictures you would see out there of moms breastfeeding. And I realize I still have a long way to go before I'll even be close to accepting my body. I just hope it comes someday.Janeenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12085755609836623027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-88718038351141165912011-01-26T08:20:09.197-08:002011-01-26T08:20:09.197-08:00I love the belly painting art!! That is a fantasti...I love the belly painting art!! That is a fantastic idea. I am currently trying for #4 and my weight has steadily risen since my first was born 7 years ago (200 before #1, gained 35 preggo pounds and then another 15 random pounds, 250 when I got pregnant with #2, and only gained 5 pounds, and 250 when I got pregnant with #3 and lost 5 pounds during pregnancy. I know I looked pregnant with #1 and #2, but not so much with #3.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-71978554016759945612011-01-24T17:13:04.802-08:002011-01-24T17:13:04.802-08:00My belly at 33 weeks is on my blog side bar. I LOV...My belly at 33 weeks is on my blog side bar. I LOVED it...and can't wait to have one again!! :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-5867070026793848482011-01-23T14:41:30.128-08:002011-01-23T14:41:30.128-08:00I can totally relate to pretty much everything you...I can totally relate to pretty much everything you've written in this post. I decided to honor my body in this pregnancy by having professional portraits done. Even though I am not thrilled with my abdomen and will be much less thrilled with it after the baby is born. I actually am discussing surgery very seriously, because all the dieting in the world won't "fix" this stomach and I'm not happy with it, and don't want to live the rest of my life with it. Others may disagree, but that's ok, they aren't living in my body. But that aside, when I was preparing for my portrait session I asked a lot of friends for tips on poses and idea for my pictures, and I was sad that there were several who absolutely refused to do pictures while they were pregnant because they felt fat. Even many who are not "plus-sized" won't do it, because they feel fat and ugly while pregnant. To me, pregnancy is the one time I do feel beautiful despite having a fat belly, because it's the one time that it's "acceptable" to have a big belly!Taminoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-45864918848904731572011-01-22T15:20:33.984-08:002011-01-22T15:20:33.984-08:00Anne Lamott calls that part of the belly the "...Anne Lamott calls that part of the belly the "sub-continent," which makes me laugh, even if my post-pregnancy, approaching menopause belly doesn't always. I have the same problem as WRM, except I had never heard of lipodema - nor had my physicians, apparently, because I had asked them about my painful calves and ankles without getting an answer. Ditto on the hypothyroid, with some adrenal fatigue, and amazing amounts of stress in the last few years.<br /><br />I honor WRM's honest post, and think it strikes the right balance of FA and a forthright description of being inside a particular body. I too had come to appreciate my fat body before this last pregnancy, and now .... well, it's more complicated. It's good that we have a safe space to discuss this.nsvnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-14306262280812812092011-01-21T15:00:54.355-08:002011-01-21T15:00:54.355-08:00I have had a lot of sadness with my last pregnancy...I have had a lot of sadness with my last pregnancy, and my current one (28 weeks now) because I don't look pregnant. I feel really envious of skinnier woman and their adorable baby bumps. Only my close family could tell I was pregnant last time, and then it was close to 7 or 8 months. After my last pregnancy, I have a lot more belly droop (I already had some), and my belly fat was more loose and jiggly.C.G.https://www.blogger.com/profile/12419159479218833836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-20597829624130301112011-01-20T16:40:17.599-08:002011-01-20T16:40:17.599-08:00I have read your blog for many years and while I a...I have read your blog for many years and while I am not sure I will ever be pregnant (due to male factor infertility) I have always loved your message.<br /><br />I struggled with this post like Lili. I understand that it came from honesty but as someone who has always carried weight in the abdomen (while having very muscular legs, thighs and buttocks) I felt really sad reading this- I know it is not about me but your journey. That is why I didn't know how to take your brutal honesty-I struggled not to personalize it-<br /><br />It seemed to create some hierarchy of female attractiveness with pears being the bomb (so to speak) and apples being the bottom. In actuality these shapes are bull-shit because no-one is shaped like a fruit! <br /><br />I also found your discussion of belly fat to lack the intricacy and nuance that you typically use to discuss assertions about body shape and health. While I am familiar with the studies you vaguely reference- I don't think that body shape has to be destiny. Junkfood Science dealt with the belly fat issue, before -debunking a lot of the myths. I am not a scientist but I will say that I work/am working hard to live a healthy lifestyle even with the pendulus abdomen that I inherited from the long line of women in my family with ample tummies...<br /><br />I still love your blog and I actually feel half glad that you revealed this- but it was a hard read.Miranoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-1925157077498861032011-01-20T14:20:40.273-08:002011-01-20T14:20:40.273-08:00@LisaL
I know exactly what you're talking abo...@LisaL<br /><br />I know exactly what you're talking about. I have a "sub-belly" (that's what I call it) too AND I'm pregnant. I'm 17 weeks along and am not too worried about whether I'll show, or not. It's kinda nice to know that I might get to be pregnant 'in peace' without people rubbing my belly for luck. I'll cross the bridge of what will my body do post baby, when I get there.<br /><br />I'm just happy to be pregnant. My boyfriend and I thought that we'd need assistance in order to get here.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09956754961671780889noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-23209970067246424442011-01-20T11:24:37.294-08:002011-01-20T11:24:37.294-08:00Oh I have a hanging gut. It's the part right u...Oh I have a hanging gut. It's the part right under my bellybutton that hangs over. And I've never been pregnant so who the hell knows what it will do when I actually get a baby belly!LisaLhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17757636046520334259noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-73743016804306098572011-01-20T10:40:36.654-08:002011-01-20T10:40:36.654-08:00I'm just now 23 weeks pregnant for the first t...I'm just now 23 weeks pregnant for the first time, so who knows how I'll feel later, but right now I looooove my belly. I realized that I was spending time caressing and lovingly cradling my belly, which seems like I'm interacting with the baby within. But I'm not feeling movement yet, so I really don't have a sense of a baby - I'm really just falling in love with my belly! Which I think is pretty cool! I absolutely can't wait to get bigger and bigger. It's all so fascinating and magical.<br /><br />I really love the first picture on this post. My belly has gotten the big rounded shape on top and the hanging squishy bits, too, and I was so delighted to see that in the picture. I was sad to see you describe your overhang part as "Eywww." I don't think my belly is eywww, and I don't think yours is, either! I was happy to see another beautiful belly shaped like mine.<br /><br />I haven't looked around online for photos of other fat pregnant women, but that's a great idea! I'll be pleased to find other images of pregnant women I can relate to.Issahttp://lovelivegrow.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-42900722868354395892011-01-20T06:08:25.385-08:002011-01-20T06:08:25.385-08:00Hi, I found your site through The Shape of a Mothe...Hi, I found your site through The Shape of a Mother, a blog I absolutely love. I was a little surprised you cited SOAM as being filled with women unhappy with their bodies, with lots of "diet talk" and surgery talk. I guess I'm wondering what about this bothers you? The women writing into this site are concerned deeply with their bodies and how they look, and have battled the media images and their own demons. They are being honest when they post their most intimate of pictures, and I find it disheartening that you judge it in that way, especially since in your own blog entry you call yourself "Shamu" and talk about how much you dislike the belly flap. Lots of women seriously dislike a part of their body, and some choose to diet or use surgery, and that is their choice. I have never felt like Shape of a Mother either encourages or discourages this - the site exists to let the women tell their OWN stories, whether happy, sad, encouraging, or depressing. SOAM itself seems to take a very strong stance on NOT judging women for their posts, yet you are judging the whole site.... <br /><br />SOAM has helped me through each and every one of my pregnancies and after, when I didn't think I'd ever be "normal" again. It is good to see other women in the same spot as I am, struggling just like I am to love and accept my body, it whatever form that may come. I wish for you body acceptance and love, just like every other woman.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-58755011401989567872011-01-20T00:01:35.328-08:002011-01-20T00:01:35.328-08:00My body has changed a lot since I had my daughter....My body has changed a lot since I had my daughter. <br />One thing that helps me stay positive about the changes and find strength in myself is to imagine that my beautiful, perfect little daughter may look exactly the same way after she gives birth one day. I think about how I want HER to feel about herself at that point. This thought helps me stay strong and focus on positive self talk, out loud, in front of my kids. It really helps to keep her as my focus.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-92187424011594714692011-01-19T23:38:56.079-08:002011-01-19T23:38:56.079-08:00I had a hard time with my last pregnancy because I...I had a hard time with my last pregnancy because I didn't carry as far out as I had the time before *plus* I'd put on a little weight and lost some muscle tone in between pregnancies. Two weeks before I was due (four days before she was born) *another* person said, "Oh, are you pregnant?" WTH, really?!? So frustrating and saddening. Especially when, from my view, I definitely looked pregnant.<br />Sorry for my mini-rant. Stopped by after someone posted a link on BabyCenter. I'm glad I did.<br /><br />Shan :+)Shanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12434884811193988493noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-42515023548277872011-01-19T23:13:43.080-08:002011-01-19T23:13:43.080-08:00I compleatly understand your struggle with this i...I compleatly understand your struggle with this issue. when I got pregnant with my first child I was excited and scared at the same time I was smaller back then and I was worried what pregnacy would do to my body well I gained about 32 pounds with her and all the weight seemed to come as the belly droop you could tell that I was pregnant thought because my daughter was 11 pounds 1 1/2 oz when she was born she was also 3 weeks over due as well and see with her being so large I also have deep scares and strech marks because the skin was pulled so tight I couldnt even rub my belly with out it spliting open and bleeding everywhere. But I have come to terms with my marks and my droop now I have had 2 more kids since then my youngest just turned 15 months and since I have had her I went from being 240 pounds to 175 pounds but I still have the droop and all the marks but I now see them as a badge of honour because I could have children when so many people can not so I have come to love the way my post baby belly looks and I am proud to say this is my belly and yes I am a mother :)Sarahnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4738062031052371885.post-85983335241105427522011-01-19T22:16:33.800-08:002011-01-19T22:16:33.800-08:00I'm another plus sized mother, 230 when I got ...I'm another plus sized mother, 230 when I got pregnant (my 3rd), 225 now (16 week pp). It's nice to know that I'm not the only one with that annoying belly flap. I'm 100% OK with the rest of my body, but sometimes I just want to take a knife to that flap, know what I mean?christinenoreply@blogger.com